#52stories - Week 2

Home.  What is home?  Where is home?  Webster's disctionary defines home in several ways:  the place you reside, the social unit formed by a family living together, a familiar or usual setting (as in "home is where the heart is"), and a place of origin.  I feel at home in at least four locations.

Fairfield, Virginia.  This is the first place I remember living and it still feels like I'm going home when I visit there now.  We lived on a farm on what is now Borden Grant Trail in a red brick house that originally belonged to my great-grandparents.  There was a huge garden, a grapevine, lots of land, a creek, woods, hills, two barns, a sawmill, and a playhouse.  We moved there when I was 2 years old and stayed until I was 9 years old (1954-1961).  Our closest neighbors were a field away in both directions.  My dad's two brothers and their families lived there, as well as other relatives.  I went to school and church with my cousins, many of whom still live there.  We moved to a house down the road from the farm, where we lived for 1 year before moving to North Carolina.  Fairfield feels like home because it is a "place of origin" for my family.  My Alexander ancestors moved there in the 1740s and Alexanders have lived there ever since.

Winston-Salem, North Carolina.  We moved us to North Carolina in 1962 because my dad switched jobs and that was, more or less, the center of his territory.  We first lived in a rental house on Ivy Avenue in north Winston.  We lived across the street from Blum Park, which was a great place to play.  I was in the 5th grade and attended North Elementary.  In the 6th grade, I went to Lowrance Elementary.  I walked to school and to church at Burkhead Methodist.  In 1964, my parents bought a house across town off of Jonestown Road--205 Araminta Drive.  From there, I attended Southwest Junior High and West Forsyth High School.  My parents stayed in that house until after my dad had died and my mom moved to a retirement complex.  She is still living in Winston, as are many friends that I have known for about 50 years.  I lived there through my college years.  In 1974, I moved to DC.  But I still feel a certain special familiarity with Winston when I visit.

Chapel Hill, North Carolina. While I only lived in Chapel Hill for the 4 years I attended college there (1970-1974), it is probably the place I would most describe as "where my heart is."  Many people do not realize that I did not have a preference to go to Carolina when I was in high school. I applied to NC State and Duke, as well; and was ambivalent about which one I would attend.  My criteria for where I went was that they offer a math degree.  I decided I would go to whichever one made the best offer in terms of financial aid. NC State offered me student loans.  Carolina offered me a Johnston Scholarship, a new one that started that year.  It would cover most of my expenses for a year.  I hadn't heard from Duke, so I accepted admission and the scholarship to Carolina.  A couple of weeks later, I received a scholarship offer from Duke.  It would cover the equivalent proportion of expenses; but by that time, I had already settled on Carolina and decided to stick with it.  I have never regretted that choice.  I met one of my best friends in my first college roommate.  In fact, she arranged my first date with Rex; so she has known him longer than I have.  I learned about football in Chapel Hill.  And basketball, of course. I saw performances there by Chicago, Chuck Berry, Livingston Taylor, Smokey Robinson & the Miracles, and others.  I heard speakers that included Roger Mudd and Jane Fonda; the latter attended a pot luck dinner in my dorm.  I saw streakers there.  I took more Calculus than I ever knew existed and made many lifelong friends there.  Chapel Hill and Carolina have changed over the years, but they still give me the feeling of being home as soon as I reach Franklin Street.  I wish that experience for anyone who attends college.

Fairfax Station, Virginia.  I have lived in Fairfax Station since Rex and I bought our current house in 1980. This is the place I reside, but it's more than that.  Whenever I go "home" to the places above or travel elsewhere, this is the place that really feels like home.  It's the place where I know I can sleep in my own bed and get a good rest.  We moved here before we had children, so I also have so many memories of Andy and Emily here.  Birthdays, Christmases, Easters, sleepovers. Andy learning to ride a bike.  Emily throwing water balloons in the driveway.  Both of them swinging on the swing set--separately and together.  I can't begin to tell all those stories.  And I expect this to be the last place that will really feel like home.  I anticipate having to move at some point to a retirement community that offers continuum of care options.  But I'm not sure that it will feel like home.  Only time will tell.